I know I do - too often!
It is amusing when I look back at times when I have taken myself too
seriously, but of course in the actual moment I don’t have a sense of humor –
because I am being too serious!
Recently I was sharing a story of how I was kept waiting at
a car repair place for an extremely long period of time (over 4 hours) and
describing how upset I was. What I
noticed (as I was telling the story) was my
self-righteous indignation at being kept waiting so long, and I saw the
underlying perspective that made me SO upset,
I had been thinking “How dare they disrespect me and my
time - I am a busy (i.e. important)
person and have clients and things to do!!!”
Of course, looking back and telling the story made me realize
how ‘Self Important’ I was feeling… and taking myself and my work waaay tooo
seriously!
It made me wonder how many other times I am unhappy, upset
and stressed, simply because I have been taking myself too seriously!
I am taking myself too seriously when:
- I take offence at someone forgetting something that I feel is important (like my birthday!)
- I am impatient when I am kept waiting
- I am self conscious on a ‘bad hair’ day
- I am worrying what another person is thinking about me
- I rehearse conversations (or arguments) in my mind before I talk to people
- I get irritated when the grocery store is out of stock on something I want
- I feel anxious when I have a tightly scheduled day
Do you do this too?
If so, we are both creating unnecessary stress in our lives!
How silly is that?
The above list is just a sampling of ways I can take myself
too seriously. I am sure I have many
more that I am not aware of. Most of the
above situations have “Shoulds” attached to them…
- “They Should remember (my birthday, or…) if they care!”
- "They Should be more considerate of other people’s time.”
- “I Should always look my best”
- “They Should agree with my point of view”
- “They Should keep their shelves stocked appropriately (i.e. my needs are important!)
- “I Should keep up with everything!”
I discovered that a sudden traumatic situation really can
clarify my perspective and it was quite easy to not take myself so
seriously. In 2010, a close friend died
suddenly and I was responsible for taking care of most of her affairs – and this
happened right in the middle of my own process of moving out of my house and
going to the mainland for 6 months!
In the midst of my grief and the overwhelming tasks I had to
take care of within less than 2 weeks, I had a gift of great clarity – I saw
how many things that had been VERY important the day before were truly
irrelevant (like a bad hair day!!)
This gift still serves me today. When I am feeling stressed about a number of
things, I ask myself (when I remember!) is this really of “life and death” importance? Almost all the time the answer is “no” and I
am able to let go of my “self importance” and relax.
Of course, I can forget this clarity of perspective and fall
back into taking myself too seriously, but I am better able to notice it and
shift these days…
Are you making insignificant things too important? If you are willing to change your
perspective, I bet you will find your sense of humor and be amused at your
folly, like I am!
InJoyingLife,
Aloha,
Maureen
P.S. I'd love to here some of your "self important" stories! Please email me at Maureen@InJoyingLife.com
